We've been getting alot of rain lately. It's been one of those things where I get to look out my cube window at work and see all the different colors. The sun comes out and I see all the blues, whites, greens and earth tones.
I think of how beautiful our world is. I think about how God gave us, through His love, the blessing of beauty. We were given eyes to see this great picture of the demonstration of His power. It all blends and creates a picture that can bring peace on a difficult day.
Sometimes, we just want to "get away". Michelle and I go hiking and just get outside. One anniversary, we hiked the entire time. I was amazed at some of the sites we saw. It brought me restoration.
Some people want to believe our world is a cosmic accident, but honestly, I can look at any given moment around me and see a picture as beautiful as a painting. With that, I am always reminded there is a painter. Thank you Lord for showing your beauty through your creation. I love you!
Dave
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Saturday, May 2, 2009
The Morning Alarm
A few years back, I went to Israel with my church and I thought it would be cool to have a shofar! I mean, the full blown deal here. The first one I got... stank bad. I mean, a shofar is a dead ram's horn... Who knew? Well, I think the first one I got had too much dead ram in it and Michelle and I spent the night in Jerusalem one night with a heavy "warm meat locker" odor going on in our hotel room. You could imagine how much she was in love with me THAT evening! I took it back the next day and exchanged my first one for one that was not so stinky.
You know, when I got this shofar, I had some pretty religious purposes for it. I wanted to blow that sucker on Jewish feasts (yeah, I know, I'm not really Jewish at all) or for something like that, but to be honest. It really didn't pan out for me.
I did finally get to where I could make a note come out of it. At first, when I blew it, it sounded like an elephant was in my bathroom. I'll let you get the sound you hear in your head at this point. Got it? Good! You can thank me later :).
Well, since I was not blowing the horn well until about 6 months after getting it home, I lost hold of the religious reasons to blow it and I just decided to have fun with it. The biggest use I got from my shofar was an alarm clock.
My son Briggs sleeps in the bottom bunk of a bunk bed, so at 5:55AM, I creeped into his room, pointed the horn at his head and let it rip. I've learned something: When you are under the covers, the covers act like a safety net when you scare the mess out of someone unconscious. After I blew the horn, Briggs probably jumped at least a foot and a half. The momentum of his shock WOULD have landed him face first attached to the underside of the top bunk, but the covers acted like an air bag and pulled him back down to his bed. "DAAAADDDD!!!" is what I heard next.
Some day, he's going to get me back, but also, I've realized that there will probably be end times ramifications for my periodic prank. You see, Jesus is coming back and with the blast of a horn. My fear now is that Jesus is going to come back in the morning, the trumpet will sound and Briggs is going to say, "DAD!! QUIT IT!!!!"
Please pray for me! (oh yeah, and Briggs too)
Dave
You know, when I got this shofar, I had some pretty religious purposes for it. I wanted to blow that sucker on Jewish feasts (yeah, I know, I'm not really Jewish at all) or for something like that, but to be honest. It really didn't pan out for me.
I did finally get to where I could make a note come out of it. At first, when I blew it, it sounded like an elephant was in my bathroom. I'll let you get the sound you hear in your head at this point. Got it? Good! You can thank me later :).
Well, since I was not blowing the horn well until about 6 months after getting it home, I lost hold of the religious reasons to blow it and I just decided to have fun with it. The biggest use I got from my shofar was an alarm clock.
My son Briggs sleeps in the bottom bunk of a bunk bed, so at 5:55AM, I creeped into his room, pointed the horn at his head and let it rip. I've learned something: When you are under the covers, the covers act like a safety net when you scare the mess out of someone unconscious. After I blew the horn, Briggs probably jumped at least a foot and a half. The momentum of his shock WOULD have landed him face first attached to the underside of the top bunk, but the covers acted like an air bag and pulled him back down to his bed. "DAAAADDDD!!!" is what I heard next.
Some day, he's going to get me back, but also, I've realized that there will probably be end times ramifications for my periodic prank. You see, Jesus is coming back and with the blast of a horn. My fear now is that Jesus is going to come back in the morning, the trumpet will sound and Briggs is going to say, "DAD!! QUIT IT!!!!"
Please pray for me! (oh yeah, and Briggs too)
Dave
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Change...
It's been a busy few weeks for me. Usually, when I'm doing alot of ministry work the biggest thing that suffers is my lawn. The dogs arm themselves with machete's and newspapers for material reading while they drudge their way through the jungle of my back yard to find a place to go potty. Usually, when I mow the back yard about once every two weeks average, It is a chore. My lawn mower acts as if it's about to explode about every 10 feet, so I have to stop and clear out the grass. However, the dogs are thankful that they can leave the machete's inside for a few days every time I mow.
I've done alot of studying lately and listening. I work for a really cool ministry and I am blessed to use what little remains of my musical talent to play at church. I also work with a number of people to lead a Small Group at my church. For a few years, that's been my means to serve God. I've learned a few things lately that seem to make alot of sense to me. I have gotten used to doing my routine and it's been so busy that I don't get to make the time I want to for God.
I got a glimpse of real sacrifice when I saw the churches giving to the community and helping those who really need it. It had an effect on me and I realized that I did alot within my church walls, but that I was missing the world outside. It hit me and has not left me. Don't get me wrong, the church building itself has its role to teach, worship and gather together, but the outside world needs people to show Jesus to them. Some serve and ministries outreach, but I saw a community... a county... that really needs my Lord.
In that realization, I saw how much God wants to love people, but as in any relationship, it's a two way street. The people have to want to love Him too. With that, I see my role differently now. There is a harvest to be had and it's time for the Church (with a big "C"), to really make a difference in the community around it.
With that for me will come life changes, sacrifice and inconvenience. I don't know how to process that yet, but hey, most people in the Bible as God directed them, only knew their next step. I have taken a step and I will see where it lands.
Please pray for me! I am going to try and write about my change as it happens. All I know is that for the longest time, I served God because I thought I owed Him something (well, in a sense I do), but now, I have this love in my heart and I want to serve Him because I love Him very much! He is so good and deserves my very best!
Dave
I've done alot of studying lately and listening. I work for a really cool ministry and I am blessed to use what little remains of my musical talent to play at church. I also work with a number of people to lead a Small Group at my church. For a few years, that's been my means to serve God. I've learned a few things lately that seem to make alot of sense to me. I have gotten used to doing my routine and it's been so busy that I don't get to make the time I want to for God.
I got a glimpse of real sacrifice when I saw the churches giving to the community and helping those who really need it. It had an effect on me and I realized that I did alot within my church walls, but that I was missing the world outside. It hit me and has not left me. Don't get me wrong, the church building itself has its role to teach, worship and gather together, but the outside world needs people to show Jesus to them. Some serve and ministries outreach, but I saw a community... a county... that really needs my Lord.
In that realization, I saw how much God wants to love people, but as in any relationship, it's a two way street. The people have to want to love Him too. With that, I see my role differently now. There is a harvest to be had and it's time for the Church (with a big "C"), to really make a difference in the community around it.
With that for me will come life changes, sacrifice and inconvenience. I don't know how to process that yet, but hey, most people in the Bible as God directed them, only knew their next step. I have taken a step and I will see where it lands.
Please pray for me! I am going to try and write about my change as it happens. All I know is that for the longest time, I served God because I thought I owed Him something (well, in a sense I do), but now, I have this love in my heart and I want to serve Him because I love Him very much! He is so good and deserves my very best!
Dave
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Perspective... From a few Tornadoes
The day after the tornados hit Murfreesboro, I was encouraged by my friend Dave to drive down with him and help the people in the Blackman community with the recovery effort on the homes. Since one of our Small Group members was in that community, it was a no brainer to go help a sister in need.
I also brought along my kids so that they could learn something that day. My son is 11 and my step son is 16, so valuable life lessons mean alot when they come. I know that time will fly and they will be gone from me soon, so I took the opportunity to share this with them.
When we got to the house, our biggest goal was to take down trees that had fallen and you could hear chainsaws running everywhere. It was almost like a Texas Chainsaw Massacre fan convention, except trees were getting taken apart and not people (thank God for that!)
I noticed that the tornadoes brought something with them beyond destruction. The tornadoes brought perspective. Sometimes neighbors live their lives with very little interaction. Sometimes they complain to each other about how the yard looks or how loud the noise is, etc. Really, none of that mattered that Saturday. I saw people from a number of different churches giving their time and efforts to help others. I saw neighbors helping neighbors. I saw people praying in the front of houses. It was a great moment.
The tornadoes brought destruction and killed two people. The response it left behind, brought an outpouring from the community. A business donated pizza and many people were walking around handing out water as we worked. People were sharing lunches and they were worn and tired only because they wanted to help.
The question that hit me was, "Why does it take this for such an outpouring to happen?" Don't get me wrong, it was amazing! In fact, it was so amazing that I wish I saw it every day! I wish it happened in stalled traffic, in long lines, at work places, sporting events, restaurants, in legal disputes... You get the picture. The perspective given to me was a wish. For a moment in time, things that seemed important before were not that important now. There was a new priority.
New Vision opened their church for those without power and for those who were homeless. Church groups gave so much and differing doctrines really didn't matter. It was the Church (with a capital "C") being the Church! I think the Church should be this active in our community every day! We shouldn't focus on trying to fill churches or auditoriums, but we should take the heart of the Church TO the people. It is a much more important mission than attendance. My pastor at World Outreach says that going to church makes you a Christian as much as going to McDonald's makes you a hamburger. I think he's right.
Maybe I am a man with a dream of revival and a better community. Either way, I was given a perspective last Saturday... a glimpse of a dream inside my heart. I hope every day, we treat each other like the people did that day in that community. Our community would be different if we did. I'm not saying that it doesn't happen. I just don't think it's happening enough.
God bless,
Dave
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Some Blog Answers from Life Groupies:
God is All Powerful:
1. Do we ever live like God is here for us instead of the fact that we are here for Him?
Amy: I think far too often that we live as if God is here for us. When we try to fit Him into our mental box, when we only come to Him when we have a need, when we neglect our time with Him for busyiness and stuff.
Michelle: Especially with our me-centric society, it’s very easy to get into the line of thinking that God is here for us…to meet our every need, want and desire. It is a very arrogant opinion to hold especially considering HE is the creator of the universe, but I have fallen into that trap myself…one that I want to consciously be reminded that this is not the case.
Lori: It is very easy to forget that we are here ONLY for His good pleasure and to serve Him. Our thoughts seem to naturally focus on what is going on in our lives, or with our families or friends. We seek Him out, sometimes routinely and sometimes with a passion or fervor when we are overwhelmed, worried, or anxious. We pray for relief from pain - emotional or physical, healing or relief from troubling relationships, etc. It is easy to forget that God is allowing us to go through each and every situation, no matter how painful, how lengthy, how troubling, to either teach us and refine us or because He is working in the lives of others and USING us to that end. We are indeed here for Him, but we easily forget!
We tell God to use us, but we forget that He is using us! In every situation that He places before us or allows us to endure, He is using us and reminding us that we are here for Him.
2. (Also from the pastor’s sermon) Name a worldview opinion that is different than God’s. If God is all powerful, how should we react to worldview opinions that differ from God’s opinion?
Amy: There are so many to choose from, from abortion being a woman's right to choose to the acceptance of sexual sin as a whole society. The way we should react is to make the bible our standard of behavior. I know that none are perfect, but this should be our goal.
Michelle: How much time and space do you have? Abortion, same-sex marriage, pre-marital sex, living with someone prior to marriage. How should we react…love the sinner…hate the sin, as well as not participate in the opinions that don’t line up with God. We are called to be in this world, but not of this world. We need to be set apart from the world, so that others will hopefully see a difference in us (Christ’ love) and will want what we have.
God is All Powerful:
1. Do we ever live like God is here for us instead of the fact that we are here for Him?
Amy: I think far too often that we live as if God is here for us. When we try to fit Him into our mental box, when we only come to Him when we have a need, when we neglect our time with Him for busyiness and stuff.
Michelle: Especially with our me-centric society, it’s very easy to get into the line of thinking that God is here for us…to meet our every need, want and desire. It is a very arrogant opinion to hold especially considering HE is the creator of the universe, but I have fallen into that trap myself…one that I want to consciously be reminded that this is not the case.
Lori: It is very easy to forget that we are here ONLY for His good pleasure and to serve Him. Our thoughts seem to naturally focus on what is going on in our lives, or with our families or friends. We seek Him out, sometimes routinely and sometimes with a passion or fervor when we are overwhelmed, worried, or anxious. We pray for relief from pain - emotional or physical, healing or relief from troubling relationships, etc. It is easy to forget that God is allowing us to go through each and every situation, no matter how painful, how lengthy, how troubling, to either teach us and refine us or because He is working in the lives of others and USING us to that end. We are indeed here for Him, but we easily forget!
We tell God to use us, but we forget that He is using us! In every situation that He places before us or allows us to endure, He is using us and reminding us that we are here for Him.
2. (Also from the pastor’s sermon) Name a worldview opinion that is different than God’s. If God is all powerful, how should we react to worldview opinions that differ from God’s opinion?
Amy: There are so many to choose from, from abortion being a woman's right to choose to the acceptance of sexual sin as a whole society. The way we should react is to make the bible our standard of behavior. I know that none are perfect, but this should be our goal.
Michelle: How much time and space do you have? Abortion, same-sex marriage, pre-marital sex, living with someone prior to marriage. How should we react…love the sinner…hate the sin, as well as not participate in the opinions that don’t line up with God. We are called to be in this world, but not of this world. We need to be set apart from the world, so that others will hopefully see a difference in us (Christ’ love) and will want what we have.
God in our suffering...
It was a Friday and being the computer nerd I am... in front of the computer, I got an email. It was from my son's teacher. He was caught cheating on a test. My heart sank. It felt like it grew in weight and sank to my stomach. I physically felt the life drain out of me in that moment.
Briggs is having some issues in school, so this just added to his current rap sheet of incidents. I had to get my message to him and since it was my weekend being a Friday, it was up to me to administer punishment and work on his studying and the issue itself.
It was a long weekend. I yelled at him trying to put the fear of God in him. His punishment was to clean my backyard and he had to study the rest of the weekend outside of that. I know: harsh, but this has been going on for some time in his life and somehow I have got to get him to stop making these decisions.
I even begged him to stop walking down this road. I told him how these decisions lead to more damaging ones and that as he gets older, the punishments get worse. I told him that I would fight him every step that he walked down this road. Not because I hate him, but because I love him so much that I don't want to see him live this way. If I deal with him, I know that I will be able to give mercy at some point. However, if he is an adult out of my care, I can't do anything if he breaks the law or loses his job.
With all this said, my son is one of the most tender-hearted kids I've seen in my life. I don't just say that because he's my son, he really is. He's a giving and respectful kid and he amazes me sometimes, but he's making these bad decisions lately that have literally hurt him and me both. I want more for him and I know he can do it.
After that weekend was over, I was emotionally drained. In that fatigue, I learned something about God. When we sin, and we are His, the pain He must feel is horrible. Sometimes, we can feel like God doesn't care when we hurt, but this weekend of punishment with Briggs has taught me alot. If the sinking feeling I had when I first learned of Briggs' cheating hit me like it did, I can only imagine how all our sins together hit God.
In the Old Testament, He calls out to Israel to return to Him. Sometimes punishment, and sometimes abandonment for a period of time, but God always took them back and restored them. At the end of the Old Testament, it looks like He's about to give up on them and scatters them, in 1948, they are a nation again. I mean really. Say you were a betting person back then, if I said, "Who do you think will exist a few hundred years from now? the Romans, the Greeks, or... the Jews? Who will have their own country?" The chances of the Jews coming out on top only could have happened with God's hand. Sin or no sin, He loves. He forgives. He restores. It's all throughout His book. It's how I want to love my son.
That weekend when Briggs was working, it was all I could do to not go help him. I knew I couldn't however. I knew he had to learn, just like I did when I was young. It hurt me to see him working on something he didn't have to do. Sometimes, trials come our way and we deal with pain and crippling times. After this weekend, I learned in as much as I could that God really cares about my pain. Well, I "knew" it, but after this weekend, I was given a taste of what He might feel with my sin and trials I've faced.
I believe now more than ever that God hurts with us through our trials and that He loves us more than we can imagine. That sounds crazy, but I think it's true. Imagine being loved more than you can understand? It's not even possible to comprehend really.
When that weekend was done, it took me a few days to recover. I had to let some things go and regain my strength, but my son left my house knowing how much I love him. God loves you. No matter how much you've sinned and no matter what you are going through. He is with you and His heart for you is good. He sealed that with the cross and made a way for you to be with Him forever... because He loves you. If you are jobless, He's your provider. If you are lonely, you are not alone. He's with you. If you are in need, He knows. Sick? He's your healer. No matter what you face, you are loved by Love Himself.
God bless,
Dave
Briggs is having some issues in school, so this just added to his current rap sheet of incidents. I had to get my message to him and since it was my weekend being a Friday, it was up to me to administer punishment and work on his studying and the issue itself.
It was a long weekend. I yelled at him trying to put the fear of God in him. His punishment was to clean my backyard and he had to study the rest of the weekend outside of that. I know: harsh, but this has been going on for some time in his life and somehow I have got to get him to stop making these decisions.
I even begged him to stop walking down this road. I told him how these decisions lead to more damaging ones and that as he gets older, the punishments get worse. I told him that I would fight him every step that he walked down this road. Not because I hate him, but because I love him so much that I don't want to see him live this way. If I deal with him, I know that I will be able to give mercy at some point. However, if he is an adult out of my care, I can't do anything if he breaks the law or loses his job.
With all this said, my son is one of the most tender-hearted kids I've seen in my life. I don't just say that because he's my son, he really is. He's a giving and respectful kid and he amazes me sometimes, but he's making these bad decisions lately that have literally hurt him and me both. I want more for him and I know he can do it.
After that weekend was over, I was emotionally drained. In that fatigue, I learned something about God. When we sin, and we are His, the pain He must feel is horrible. Sometimes, we can feel like God doesn't care when we hurt, but this weekend of punishment with Briggs has taught me alot. If the sinking feeling I had when I first learned of Briggs' cheating hit me like it did, I can only imagine how all our sins together hit God.
In the Old Testament, He calls out to Israel to return to Him. Sometimes punishment, and sometimes abandonment for a period of time, but God always took them back and restored them. At the end of the Old Testament, it looks like He's about to give up on them and scatters them, in 1948, they are a nation again. I mean really. Say you were a betting person back then, if I said, "Who do you think will exist a few hundred years from now? the Romans, the Greeks, or... the Jews? Who will have their own country?" The chances of the Jews coming out on top only could have happened with God's hand. Sin or no sin, He loves. He forgives. He restores. It's all throughout His book. It's how I want to love my son.
That weekend when Briggs was working, it was all I could do to not go help him. I knew I couldn't however. I knew he had to learn, just like I did when I was young. It hurt me to see him working on something he didn't have to do. Sometimes, trials come our way and we deal with pain and crippling times. After this weekend, I learned in as much as I could that God really cares about my pain. Well, I "knew" it, but after this weekend, I was given a taste of what He might feel with my sin and trials I've faced.
I believe now more than ever that God hurts with us through our trials and that He loves us more than we can imagine. That sounds crazy, but I think it's true. Imagine being loved more than you can understand? It's not even possible to comprehend really.
When that weekend was done, it took me a few days to recover. I had to let some things go and regain my strength, but my son left my house knowing how much I love him. God loves you. No matter how much you've sinned and no matter what you are going through. He is with you and His heart for you is good. He sealed that with the cross and made a way for you to be with Him forever... because He loves you. If you are jobless, He's your provider. If you are lonely, you are not alone. He's with you. If you are in need, He knows. Sick? He's your healer. No matter what you face, you are loved by Love Himself.
God bless,
Dave
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Body for Life pain...
Well, I'm nearing the end of my 2nd week of "Body for Life". Up until now, I had changed the name to "Pain for Life". I know I have a ways to go, but to be honest, I think the worst is almost over in the workout area. Here are a few highlights for me.
My first week was interesting. Michelle and I went to the gym for our leg workout. I knew this leg workout would be a test of our marriage. We decided to alternate exercises so we could finish our workouts quicker than the two hours it took us the first time. (The first workout, we had to have some extra time for tears. I'm surprised we survived.) Well, unfortunately, the exercise I picked for Michelle was "lunges". Let me tell you. She hates lunges. After her first set, I think I got a look that our lives together were almost over. She assured me later that it made her love for me stronger after the experience was done. I'm not sure I believe her. These days, I sleep with one eye open.
We get home from our first leg "exercise" and grunted and snorted upstairs. Michelle decides to check her email while I go off to bedroom to change clothes. (I really went to weep bitterly, but I didn't want Michelle to know this.) Upon changing, I hear Michelle yell "OOOAAAHH!!!" in the most horrible noise that I think I've ever heard her make. At this point, I feel like something is wrong, so go to her laptop to see if she's ok. She wasn't at the laptop, so I hit the stairs. Upon going down one step, this horrible noise came out of my mouth: "OOOAAAHH!!!" I then realized I had retraced my wife's path with both legs and noise. I was slow, but I knew not to ask her if she was ok. I think she would have kicked my rear if she could have raised her foot high enough to reach it.
So the morning of my run after the leg "slaughter" as I like to call it, I was laying in bed feeling a slight "discomfort" at 5:00AM. Not thinking and half awake, I rolled out of the bed like any other day and I had a slight shock when my feet hit the floor. As my leg muscles (what was left of them) began to support my weight, I pretty much was at a standstill. I leaned forward and let momentum carry me into the bathroom, trying not to bend my knees. Relying totally on bone structure and not muscles to keep me on two feet.
With this all together, I limp to my truck to get to work for a "brisk" 20 minute run. By the end of this run, I was at almost a full sprint. I've learned that you can still run if need be, even if your legs are sore. Stopping.... that's another story. At one point in the run, I thought I was about to see Jesus. The words "Lord, receive my spirit" came to mind when I hit the fastest part of my run. I did not think I'd get off the treadmill. I figured I was going to fly off and my body was going to embed into the wall. I could see the police making a chalk line on the wall where my body was stuck. I'm sure I could have made some sort of Wile E. Coyote pose before I died to make it difficult to draw. Somehow I survived.
Do you know that after a leg workout and a run, your legs get sorer? I got upstairs (ok, I took the elevator. Forget the stairs) and realized I had to sit down. I was very glad my chair had wheels. I decided to bend my legs ever so slightly and let gravity take me the rest of the way there. After my chair rolled back 4 feet, I slowly scooted to my work area.
Thus the next problem. On this program, you have to drink 10 cups of water a day. I had a 4 cup jug I went through and realized that water makes you go to the bathroom more than other fluids. So as I sat there, I debated the effort it would take to get out of my seat vs. wetting my pants. I'm really glad my counters support my entire weight, because my last option was to roll to the bathroom in my chair and go from there. I was not sure how I could explain rolling my office chair to the john.
On a serious note, I've learned that change can be painful, but on the other side of it, the pain makes you stronger. I got a great example of this in the program. There are things that hurt me that first week that don't hurt me now. Even if the pain comes, it is no where near the intensity it was when I started. I will stick with this until I'm completely who I want to be.
I think this mimics life. Change can be a very painful process, no matter what you do, but in the end, you are a much stronger person. We have to change constantly to draw closer to God, because He is the one that never changes. It's us. If we quit changing, we are missing something.
Also, I really am glad to be doing this with Michelle. We will have stories to share for years. It really has made us stronger mentally and physically. I figure that if I have more energy, I have more to give to my Lord. I think that's the goal for me anyway.
God bless,
Dave
My first week was interesting. Michelle and I went to the gym for our leg workout. I knew this leg workout would be a test of our marriage. We decided to alternate exercises so we could finish our workouts quicker than the two hours it took us the first time. (The first workout, we had to have some extra time for tears. I'm surprised we survived.) Well, unfortunately, the exercise I picked for Michelle was "lunges". Let me tell you. She hates lunges. After her first set, I think I got a look that our lives together were almost over. She assured me later that it made her love for me stronger after the experience was done. I'm not sure I believe her. These days, I sleep with one eye open.
We get home from our first leg "exercise" and grunted and snorted upstairs. Michelle decides to check her email while I go off to bedroom to change clothes. (I really went to weep bitterly, but I didn't want Michelle to know this.) Upon changing, I hear Michelle yell "OOOAAAHH!!!" in the most horrible noise that I think I've ever heard her make. At this point, I feel like something is wrong, so go to her laptop to see if she's ok. She wasn't at the laptop, so I hit the stairs. Upon going down one step, this horrible noise came out of my mouth: "OOOAAAHH!!!" I then realized I had retraced my wife's path with both legs and noise. I was slow, but I knew not to ask her if she was ok. I think she would have kicked my rear if she could have raised her foot high enough to reach it.
So the morning of my run after the leg "slaughter" as I like to call it, I was laying in bed feeling a slight "discomfort" at 5:00AM. Not thinking and half awake, I rolled out of the bed like any other day and I had a slight shock when my feet hit the floor. As my leg muscles (what was left of them) began to support my weight, I pretty much was at a standstill. I leaned forward and let momentum carry me into the bathroom, trying not to bend my knees. Relying totally on bone structure and not muscles to keep me on two feet.
With this all together, I limp to my truck to get to work for a "brisk" 20 minute run. By the end of this run, I was at almost a full sprint. I've learned that you can still run if need be, even if your legs are sore. Stopping.... that's another story. At one point in the run, I thought I was about to see Jesus. The words "Lord, receive my spirit" came to mind when I hit the fastest part of my run. I did not think I'd get off the treadmill. I figured I was going to fly off and my body was going to embed into the wall. I could see the police making a chalk line on the wall where my body was stuck. I'm sure I could have made some sort of Wile E. Coyote pose before I died to make it difficult to draw. Somehow I survived.
Do you know that after a leg workout and a run, your legs get sorer? I got upstairs (ok, I took the elevator. Forget the stairs) and realized I had to sit down. I was very glad my chair had wheels. I decided to bend my legs ever so slightly and let gravity take me the rest of the way there. After my chair rolled back 4 feet, I slowly scooted to my work area.
Thus the next problem. On this program, you have to drink 10 cups of water a day. I had a 4 cup jug I went through and realized that water makes you go to the bathroom more than other fluids. So as I sat there, I debated the effort it would take to get out of my seat vs. wetting my pants. I'm really glad my counters support my entire weight, because my last option was to roll to the bathroom in my chair and go from there. I was not sure how I could explain rolling my office chair to the john.
On a serious note, I've learned that change can be painful, but on the other side of it, the pain makes you stronger. I got a great example of this in the program. There are things that hurt me that first week that don't hurt me now. Even if the pain comes, it is no where near the intensity it was when I started. I will stick with this until I'm completely who I want to be.
I think this mimics life. Change can be a very painful process, no matter what you do, but in the end, you are a much stronger person. We have to change constantly to draw closer to God, because He is the one that never changes. It's us. If we quit changing, we are missing something.
Also, I really am glad to be doing this with Michelle. We will have stories to share for years. It really has made us stronger mentally and physically. I figure that if I have more energy, I have more to give to my Lord. I think that's the goal for me anyway.
God bless,
Dave
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)